Holiday Shopping

I know it might seem early, but really, I promise, the holidays are right around the corner, and I need to start thinking about my shopping. Naturally, it’s important for me to give books to as many people on my list as possible, even those who are not necessarily big readers. The trick is finding the perfect book, something they haven’t read before and that will hopefully grab their interests.

For ideas I thought I’d reach out to my blog community. After all, who better to ask but a bunch of readers.

So here’s a brief rundown of my list. Any suggestions?

Girl, age 12: I’ve gifted her A Wrinkle in Time, which she loved, and would really like to give her Hunger Games, but is she too young? That’s one thing I’ve never gotten a handle on when it comes to other people’s kids. What is age-appropriate. My other concern is that Hunger Games is so, so popular, is it ridiculous to think she hasn’t already read it? Any other thoughts?

Boy, age 15: Last year I had a hit with Into the Wild. It was an inspired find if I do say so myself, and he seemed truly interested, which I was thrilled with, especially since I don’t think he’s much of a reader. So I’m thinking nonfiction again this year. Is Krakauer’s Where Men Win Glory too much?

Boy, age 10: This is my tough one. I haven’t got a clue. He loves silly things that make him laugh, but 10 is a tough age for me. What do 10-year-old boys read?

Adult male: Who has loved books like Methland.

Adult male: Who also loves nonfiction, but also thrillers. Was a fan of Girl with a Dragon Tattoo as well as Devil in a White City.

Hmmm, I know there are others, but I can’t think of them at this time. What about you? Have you started your shopping yet? What are you buying for those on your list?

Jessica

A BookEnds Rejection

By request, I’m doing something that for some reason feels a little scary. I’m going to post my standard rejection letter on the blog. I don’t know why this feels scary, like I’m revealing a big dirty secret or something, since you can find this in various writers’ forums and websites all over the Internet.

That being said, here goes:

Thank you so much for sending along your query and for giving BookEnds a chance to consider your work. While I found your query intriguing I’m afraid I wasn’t sufficiently enthusiastic to ask for more at this time.

As I’m sure you know, publishing is a subjective business and I’m sure there’s another agent out there better suited to your work.

I wish you the best of luck and the greatest success.

Now, keep in mind that this is my standard rejection. I also have a few variations of this for different circumstances. For example, if I feel your query is a complete disaster I might suggest you revamp it before sending it to other agents; if your query was really close and maybe a tweak or two would have pushed me to asking for more, I have a rejection for that. I also have responses for queries that are sent as attachments (but I won’t read), novellas (which I typically don’t do), queries for books with obvious word count issues, etc.

So, since I shared my rejection, I’m curious. If you were an agent receiving close to 100 queries a day, what kind of standard rejection would you write? Or would you even send rejections? Would you try to personalize every one?

The trick for me is writing a rejection that’s kind and encouraging, that’s vague enough so that the author doesn’t think a rewrite is necessary when I don’t know if it is, and that doesn’t sound condescending. Believe it or not, I don’t want to crush the hopes and dreams of authors.

Jessica

A writer with bad hand-writing?

A few confessions:

1) In first grade, the highest mark I got for penmanship was FAIR. Never good or excellent (unlike the little red-headed girl next to me.) Just FAIR. I learned to hate the word fair.

2) I wrote so much in long-hand, and so many notes in college on that teeny-tiny college ruled paper, that by the time I graduated college (to become a teacher), I had handwriting that resembled a doctor's. It was BAD.

Can you imagine my terror upon realizing I had to (a) write on the board for those lovable scamps I called students and (b) write notes home to said lovable scamps' parents?

So one of my first assignments to myself as a teacher was to learn how to write again. My handwriting still leaves a lot to be desired, and I envy anyone with a nice, crisp print or a beautiful cursive hand -- someone, say, like Nicole Ducleroir, who tagged me for a hand-writing tag.

Showing off my handwriting is right up there with me putting a pix of me in my yellow bikini on my blog (yes, I still have my yellow bikini, yes, it still fits, and no, I don't wear it anywhere in public, unless you count The Sister's hot tub as public.) But for Natalie, I will grit my teeth and expose my shame.



Write down (by hand!) on a piece of paper the following:

1. Name, Blog Name
2. Right handed, left handed, or both?
3. Favorite letters to write
4. Least favorite letters to write
5. Write out "the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog"
6. Write in CAPS: BABOON, SPLENDOR, ONOMATOPOEIA, FLIP-FLOPS, HUZZAH!
7. Favorite song lyrics
8. Tag 7 people
9. Whatever else strikes your fancy (Me, I have supper calling, so no more silliness for me tonight!)

It was interesting, this assignment, that I had to confess my least favorite letter to write -- that would be C. Yes, the C that I write my name with. My "c" leaves much to be desired, aesthetically speaking, and it's one of the letters I'd like to improve on. Also, I'm a Georgia girl, and Georgia girls' "c's" ought to resemble the Coca Cola "c."

And now my tagged victims:

Tawna Fenske
Linda Grimes
Julie Musil
Anne Gallagher
Nelsa Roberto
Lola Sharp
Jessica Lemmon

Celebrating a Survivor

Today my mom underwent a successful double mastectomy. The surgeon removed all the cancer, and it had not spread to the lymph nodes. We are all very relieved! She may be released from the hospital tomorrow, and then will be recovering at home for 2-3 weeks. We are very thankful that she caught this early.

Thank you all so much for all of your support, both of my mom and our family, and of my fundraising for blood cancers and Karen's fundraising for breast cancer. You've heard me say it before, but cancer sucks.

Please join us in celebrating our mom and our grandmother (another breast cancer survivor) in the American Cancer Society's Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walk on November 6th in Tempe. Sign up for our team! No registration fee and no fundraising minimum. We are just going out to raise awareness and honor some wonderful people. And maybe wear pink.

I and several of my friends will also be running the Women's Half Marathon the following day in support of Susan G. Komen for the Cure. Come out and race or cheer us on!

Here's to "a world with more birthdays"!

Small Press v. Agent

I am a faithful reader of your blog. I think I have read about similar situations, but I just can't recall one exactly like this, or maybe I just couldn't find it! I wrote a book a year and a half ago, and I queried it to a few agents. Although one or two requested partials, nothing came of that. (I never heard back from one, and the other rejected me.)

I was reading a book by a new author almost a year ago on my kindle and noticed that the editor in the credits accepted queries. I decided to try sending a partial (which they accepted with the query) to the editor, [small press here]. It's a small press, but seems reputable, and I have spoken to that author via email. She said that although the money wasn't huge from her book deal with them, it helped her land an agent who helped her sign a book deal with [big press here]. (Plus, let's face it--if it's all about money for me I should probably stick with my day job as a lawyer and quit messing around with fiction writing.)

Eight months after my original submission (two days ago) [small press] responded with some suggested edits and asked for a full manuscript once the edits were done. I agree the edits are a good idea.

Now to my question. Do I just send them my edited manuscript once I complete it? Or do I begin the query process all over again with agents first, hoping to find an agent who will handle a small contract? Do you think agents who have previously turned me down might be interested to know if a publisher is now interested, or should I only query agents who haven't already turned me down before? (Even if they are my dream agents.)

Hope this isn't too complicated/specific a question!

I loved the author’s tone and voice in this email, which is why I included the entire thing.

Here’s my advice. Finish the edited manuscript, send it to the editor and start querying agents at the same time. Let them know you’ve received a request from [small press] and, yes, if you want to requery agents do so, but only those who have not yet read the partial.

If you still don’t have an agent when the publisher’s offer comes in (always think positively), contact everyone who has yet to respond to see if you can turn that offer into an agent contract as well.

Jessica

A message from The Professional Muse Society

Cynthia's Muse, here, with an important request from The Professional Muse Society.

Ya know, it's not in my job description to actually get in here and write blog posts for her. It's not in my job description to write anything, actually, but ya know how it is, working with these creative types. They go all moody on you and then ya gotta endure it, like my Uncle Art has to endure his hemorrhoids.

Cynthia, now, she's not so bad. It's not like she listens, or anything, but then ya can't have everything, now can ya? At least she's not snappin' her fingers at two in the morning and saying, "abracadabra," like I'm some sort of genie in a bottle. I've had writers like that, and they are a pain in the tuches.

When I got assigned to her, eh, way back in 2003, I told HR it was never gonna work. Me? A fabulous dresser who never shows up in public without my nails done? Working with a Georgia girl who'd never been to the 212 area code? Who didn't even own a pair of stilettos? Plus, there is the issue of the lack of clothing space for my wardrobe. Been here since 2003, and I still don't have the walk-in closet I need for my feather boas.

But that Cynthia, she's got the work ethic. You'd think she was a little Puritan straight from the Mayflower, the way she goes at it. Half the trouble with her -- or maybe it's more like three-quarters, cuz ya know fractions weren't ever my forte, except when I'm figuring sales prices at Bergdorfs -- is that she won't let me do my job.

She works, works, works, writes, writes, writes. I tell her, "Honey, take a break. Have some fun. Go play. Go get a wardrobe that doesn't look like it comes from the Lands End school uniform catalog, for gracious sakes. And by the way, get your nails done -- maybe a nice French manicure?"

But, no. Who am I that she should listen to me? I'm just a muse that's been doing this way before Cynthia was holding out for three packs of paper and blue Papermate pens for a Christmas present.

People, ya gotta listen, especially you writer types. All work and no play? Not effective. Ya gotta scoot off and play a little -- catch that sale at Macy's, go get ya hair done, try on some sparkly shoes -- so's we muses can work our magic. I speak on behalf of The Professional Muse Society -- hey, I heard that snicker about PMS, ya little pipsqueak -- Excuse me while I chase this shmendrik off this blog. I'll have to finish this advice in another blog post.

Working Social Media

I am no expert in social media, not by a long stretch. There are so many great people out there who are, people writing blogs and books, that if you want expertise that’s where you should go. That being said, I am frequently asked what specifically authors can do and should do to help create the often-discussed buzz. Sure, you’re supposed to get a Twitter account, blog, and Facebook account, but once you have those, what works and what doesn’t?

Here’s what I think.

You should only do what works for you.
I enjoy my blog, which is why I do it. It wouldn’t work if I didn’t enjoy it. When I signed up for Twitter I wasn’t sure it was for me. It felt like more work and I just didn’t get it. I remember having conversations with Kim that I might quit. But I persevered. I gave it time and now I actually enjoy it. I use Twitter to check in on industry news and as a break. When I finish a big project I often celebrate via Twitter, and when I’m sitting down to start something it’s sometimes nice to share. It’s not just about spreading the news, but it actually helps motivate me in some weird way.

It’s not all about you.
Updating your status and Tweeting about what you’re eating for lunch has led us to believe that we live in a world where people actually care. They really don’t. Make sure when using your social media that you are talking about more than just yourself. Retweet posts or articles of interest, and most definitely engage with others. No one wants to be Facebook friends with someone who never responds to things written on their wall or ignores what everyone else is up to, but expects accolades for their own status.

Post often, but not too often.
I’ll admit that I’ve “unfollowed” Twitter pals who seem to overtake my inbox, those who have a new Tweet every five minutes or even every hour. I think one Tweet a day is fine, maybe five, but 25! That’s a little extreme and, to some extent, goes back to my second point about the fact that it can’t be all about you. No one wants to check their account only to see that you’ve been so busy none of their other friends have room to show up.

Time management
There are so many social media organizing programs out there. Use them. Most of my blog posts are written days or weeks in advance and certain Tweets are even written days, weeks or months in advance. If I know that something exciting is going to happen on a certain day, something I’ll want to Tweet about (which also links to my Facebook status by the way, so I only have to update one), I write the Tweet and set the schedule. That way if I’m busy that day the job is already done.

Make it personal
Just as you shouldn’t always make it about you, you should sometimes make it about you. I recently “unfollowed” a Tweeter because of constant article retweeting, but nothing about her. It was tiresome and boring. I do want to know something personal about the people I’m following, sometimes I do want to know what you’re making for dinner, or that the dog just jumped in your lap and deleted your writing. That’s the fun stuff that allows people to connect with you.

Not too personal
While I do enjoy learning some personal items about those I follow (for business), I also don’t need to know what kind of underwear you wear, I don’t need to hear a political rant, and I don’t think bashing others is appropriate. Again, if it’s with friends, fine, but if this is an attempt to get buzz to sell books, I’m not sure it’s the right forum.

Those are my thoughts off the cuff. What about you? Who are you following or friending and why? Who are you unfollowing or defriending and why?

Jessica

Silly Business

Curse you, Robert Croak.

Mr. Croak, it turns out, is the guy who invented Silly Bandz, those shaped rubber-band bracelets that every kid is going nuts for these days. And by every kid, yes, that does include The Kiddo.

She has almost a hundred of the little suckers, and the only good things I can say about them are at least they don’t take up much room and they aren’t that expensive (although, I could get her a thousand regular rubber bands for the price of two dozen Silly Bandz, so maybe that’s not quite an accurate observation.)

Trust me, if you want to see a teacher steam, just waggle a Silly Band in front of her.

If the pesky little rubber bands would stay put on a child’s arm, it would be one thing. That’s way too much to hope for, not when kids can string them together in long necklaces and have protracted haggling/trading sessions that would make the brokers on the New York Stock Exchange look like amateurs.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m proud that Mr. Croak found a way to make a living during this recession. And I’m glad he has made a success out of a few cents worth of rubber band materials. I’m not begrudging him his pursuit of happiness.

I’m begrudging him my pursuit of SANITY.

I strictly forbade The Kiddo taking the little sapsuckers to school. Hey, I was a teacher, and I know how hard it is to keep a kid’s attention on math or reading even without the latest fad. I could see in two quick blinks of an eye the aggravation Silly Bandz could cause.

Of course, no good deed goes unpunished. The Kiddo started in at once on the, “but everyone else wears Silly Bandz!” and “I promise, promise, promise that I won’t play with them at school.”

My response was to give her the steely-eyed, “I’m no fool” look and to drag, from somewhere deep, deep inside me, yet another, “no.”

“But, please, please, Mommy,” she begged me, “just ASK the teachers and you’ll see that it’s okay. We can wear Silly Bandz.”

So I did. After the aforementioned steam stopped hissing, the teachers were able to confirm my earlier suspicion: Silly Bandz weren’t quite the devil incarnate, but they sure beat the stuffing out of studying place values and main ideas, and as such, didn’t exactly complement the Three R’s. In fact, the principal had just handed down a No-Silly-Bandz policy.

I do wish Mr. Croak all the success in the world. But first? Could he serve a time-out of sorts? If I had my druthers, I’d stick him in a classroom replete with 25 students loaded to the gills with the silly sapsuckers and tell him that he needed to teach a lesson on independent clauses. If he managed to get the concept across without confiscating his rubber swag, why, then he really would have earned my respect.

Wide Sargasso Sea - Jean Rhys

Given that Jane Eyre is one of my favourite books of all times, I'm a bit surprised that I hadn't heard of this book until this year.

(Spoiler alert: I'm assuming that everyone knows the plot of Jane Eyre, whether you have read the book or not. If you don't want to know what happens in Jane Eyre, you'd best stop reading this post now.)

This book is basically the story of the "madwoman in the attic" from Jane Eyre, based on hints given to her story in Jane's story.

What we know about the Madwoman: she was born in the Caribbean; she is the "infamous daughter of an infamous mother", a dipsomaniac and insane; Mr. Rochester married her due to the plotting of his father and older brother in order to bring him some wealth not normally due to a second son; following the death of his father and brother, he brought her back to England and locked her up in the tower under the supervision of Grace Poole, where she eventually burned down the house and committed suicide.

This book goes into her childhood in a post-emancipation Jamaica, her mother's poverty and second marriage, her reluctant marriage and the subsequent fall-out. An interesting concept, but I found that the promise didn't live up to my expectations. Compared with Jane Eyre, despite being set in a much more lush location (the Caribbean vs. England), I found it to be a much less rich book in terms of depth and description. I found the plot a bit difficult to follow, though that may be because the first person narrator is an alcoholic and possibly insane. I also suspect that it would make even less sense if the reader weren't familiar with the story as presented in Jane Eyre.

It does point out though, that there are multiple points of view to every story, and calls into question why the first Mrs. Rochester became insane. In Jane Eyre, it is presumed to be genetic, however in this book it is presented as a combination of childhood experiences, culture shock, repression, and alcohol.

Much as I love the book Jane Eyre and it's heroine, I never had much sympathy for Mr. Rochester - he struck me as being very selfish, vain, and condescending. And what appeals to me about Jane is her integrity and how she stayed true to her principles, no matter how much it hurt at the time. I never quite understood what Jane saw in Mr. Rochester, and his character didn't come across any more favourably in this book.

I borrowed this book from a friend who had read it from school (the same friend who recommended Pride and Prejudice and Zombies to me); and she warned me when I borrowed it that she wasn't a fan of Jane Eyre, but loved Wide Sargasso Sea. Sorry Kirsti - this is 3 out of 3 books that I disagree with you over! It did however give me a craving to re-read Jane Eyre, so I think that I will curl up with that book next.

I Tri-ed.

1 triathlon down. That's all I have to say.

Pictures:

See Jane Run Tri September 2010

And videos:

Beautiful Bay Area

Sailing last Friday night:




(The sailing still sucked.)

Moonrise over the City:

The Girl who Played with Fire - Stieg Larsson

Sex and violence; sex and violence. If I had to sum up this book, that is how I would do it.

Back in the summer when I read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, I wasn't sure if I would continue with this series. But enough people persuaded me that the other books were better that I decided to pick up the next book in the series. And they were right - The Girl who Played with Fire was much more interesting and engaging than Dragon Tattoo.

The one factor in Dragon Tattoo that I truly enjoyed was the character of Lisbeth Salander, and this book focused primarily on her. It picks up about a year after the end of Dragon Tattoo when Salander cut off all association with Mikael Blomkvist. It is a more conventional mystery than the first book - three people have been murdered and the police, along with Blomkvist and his magazine and a private investigation firm, have to solve the murders. Salander is the prime suspect right from the get-go.

I don't know what it is about Salander that appeals to me. She can be unpredictable, violent, anti-social, and stubborn. But she has a strong sense of justice that appeals to me; and she is completely self-reliant, not depending on any other person. And she is stronger than any person I have ever met in real life. This is summed up near the end of the book:

"Over the years she had been mixed up in fights, subjected to abuse, been the object of both official and private injustces. She had taken many more punches to both body and soul than anyone should ever have to endure. But she had been able to rebel every time."

In this book, the reader gets to learn about her history, and what happened to make her the way that she is. (I'm not going to reveal it here - you'll have to read the book to find out!)

I can't always turn my physiotherapist brain off when reading. I found fault with the injury in The Solitude of Prime Numbers, and there is an anatomy fault towards the end of this book. I challenge anyone with any knowledge of neuroanatomy to figure out where the bullet is lodged based on this description: "The third bullet caught her about an inch below the top of her left ear. It penetrated her skull and caused a spiderweb of radial cracks in her cranium. The lead came to rest in the grey matter about two inches beneath the cerebral cortex, by the cerebrum." Hmmm.... last time I checked, the cerebral cortex is grey matter, so if it were lodged beneath the cerebral cortex, it would be lodged in white matter; and the cerebrum refers to the main part of the brain so if it in the cerebrum, it can't be near the cerebrum. OK, I guess that authors can't be perfect!

This book ends with a cliff-hanger, so there is no question that I will eventually read the final book in this trilogy. I can't see myself buying the hardcover, so I will either wait for the paperback or track it down from the library.

Because I Believe Too

But she said it perfectly.

Jessica

Perfecting the Opening Paragraph

A topic I need help with is opening paragraphs. This is such an important area that so many authors struggle. I wrote and rewrote mine more times than I can count. I understand that the opening paragraphs will make or break an author's chance of becoming published. You only get one chance to capture the attention of an agent or publisher.

I don’t often give writing advice, primarily because I’m not a writer, but also because unless I read the material it’s hard for me to really have an opinion. Your opening paragraphs are important, as is every paragraph that follows. I have no idea what type of revisions and editing you’re doing, but I will tell you that spending so much time on just the opening paragraph isn’t going to help if the rest of the manuscript isn’t looked at with the same type of care. I also think that a lot of time is spent on the mechanics of the opening paragraphs, or the book in general, when what really grabs an agent is the voice of those first lines.

Jessica

Symbolically speaking

Mouth the words "high school literature."

I'll bet, if your high school lit courses were anything like mine, the words evoked THE RED BADGE OF COURAGE, MADAME BOVARY, Hemingway and ... symbolism.

I was a puffed-up little peacock about writing back then. When my English teachers talked to us about writers using symbolism in their works, I rolled my eyes to the point I nearly had to pick 'em up off the floor.

"Symbolism? Ha!" I thought. "Writers just write. It's all these English teachers and professors who start saying Hemingway is using Christian symbolism in THE OLD MAN AND THE SEA. Hemingway was probably too drunk to even think about symbolism."

I held my tongue, got an A and moved onto college, where I waded through still more swamps of symbolism. Sure, I could see how poets use symbolism. But writers of prose?

It was a movie which actually showed me the power of symbolism. SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY is a particular favorite of mine, although the book was more of a mixed bag. For those of you who haven't seen it or read the book, it is about an abused woman who fakes her death to escape the clutches of her husband.

In the movie (not the book), the life she escapes is one of wealth and privilege. Her husband is OCD about things being tidy and neat. The setting for the house is ultra modern, with cold, spare lines. But the house she escapes to is old-fashioned, with romantic frilly touches.

I remember seeing those two settings, remember how the power of that hit me. It was the juxtaposition of the two styles of homes that underscored the life she'd left -- cold and sterile -- for her new life -- warm and soft. It just drove the point home in a simple, non-verbal way.

That's when I realized that the objects and situations in a character's world could echo the plot. And really, isn't that what symbolism is? A shortcut of sorts?

So do I use symbolism in my romance novels? You betcha. In THE BABY WAIT, there is one situation that I use symbolically, and I had to break a rule to do it.

My two characters, a man and wife, are literally stuck in a traffic jam. Now, in every writer's seminar you will ever attend, they warn you against having two characters in a car talking. But in this case, I used that traffic jam to symbolize where they were at that point in the plot -- stuck in transit, not anywhere close to where they wanted to be.

Most of the symbolism that I use is very brief -- an object, a place, a song. It's got to be subtle, or else it's overkill. All I want to do is to create an echo.

So now do I think Hemingway used symbolism? Oh, yeah, I think he did. Now what about you? Do you use symbolism?

Segregation

This has been all over facebook, so I'm sure you've seen it before, but I just have to comment. The Bay Area is in the article as a BONUS: relatively mixed area.



Take a look at the City of San Francisco - the top of the peninsula over on the left. Let's see - there's the Asians in Chinatown, the Sunset, and the Richmond; the blacks in Bayview and Western Addition; the Hispanics in the Mission; and the whites in Marina, Pacific Heights, Lower Haight, Cole Valley, Twin Peaks, and the Castro.

This is relatively mixed? Good grief!

(Not that I can talk, living in the Castro and all. But I am still a minority here!)

Apparently I'm a Runner.

Have I mentioned I'm doing my very 1st triathlon on Saturday? Probably a few times.

Here is proof of how much of a Tri Newbie I am:

On Sunday during my training ride I had some trouble with my gears (got out of 3rd and couldn't get back in), so I decided to take my bike in to the shop this week and have the derailleur adjusted. Of course on my ride to the shop, I discovered that I had no problems shifting at all. I figured since I was by then right next to the shop, I might as well just stop in.

So I explained to the shop guys that I had had a shifting problem but it seemed fine now, but could they just please check it because I have a race this weekend.

One of the shop guys promptly asked - "A triathlon?"

Yes, clearly I am not doing a road race on my ancient bicycle.

He followed up - "Are you a swimmer or a runner?"

Clearly not being a swimmer (feel free to ask my family about that), I found myself being forced to tell him that I was, in fact, a runner. A runner? How strange. That doesn't really seem to apply to me. I've only been doing it for a bit over a year.

But I guess soon I'll be a triathlete. Maybe I'll even buy a new bike and learn to shift gears properly so I don't break the dang thing. Of course, that's if I make it through this first race.

And then the week after that, I'll become a sailor (even helmswoman). So I guess in the last 1.25 years, I'll have added three new titles: Runner, Triathlete, Sailor. You know what they say: Jack of all trades, master of none!

(In case you were wondering, the shop guys proclaimed in bike in fine shape and sent me off with no charge. The other customer wished me good luck! It reminded me why I love local shops, although in the past the shop guys there seem to be more interested in drinking than actually working. Oh well.)

Do Political Beliefs Impact Representation

[reader’s name deleted to protect identity] comment prompted me to check his web page, which turns out to be little more than political screed full of hatred and vile language.

We all know agents (like prospective employers) check out potential clients online. I don't mean to pick on [reader]. Rather, this is an earnest question:

When a prospective client's blog or website is full of political ranting (from the left or right), does this affect your decision to represent them, either negatively or positively?

Wouldn’t it be nice if I could say, “No, absolutely not,” but let’s be honest. It will or could, in the same way any political thoughts or rantings I might share on this blog would impact whether or not you might want me to represent you.

Now, certainly you’ll have people who might reject you because your beliefs are different from theirs. In fact, a few years ago I shared a story with you about an editor who rejected a project I was pitching because of his political beliefs. They didn’t align with those of the project, which, granted, was a current affairs/political project. But something I don’t want you to forget is that you might also have people who would not want to represent you because although they might agree with your opinions, they might not like the fact that you’re ranting. Your style of expressing those opinions might be a turn-off.

Ultimately, if the project is great enough, many agents will overlook “rantings”; that being said, ranting can say a lot more about you as a person than simply what your political beliefs are. How you present yourself might say to an agent that you’re difficult to work with, or would be a handful, and even a great project might not be worth that because, as an old boss of mine used to say, “life is too short.”

Jessica

A Gibbs Girl

I admit it. I love television.

I know. So many writers pooh-pooh television, saying that it shrinks our brains and hampers our creativity. But give me a well-written drama, and I can learn so much about writing and pacing from it.

Say ... NCIS.

I further admit that I am a Gibbs girl, myself. I love me some Gibbs -- Gibbs is one of those characters that appear at the top of my "If I were ever stranded on a desert island" lists. He'd probably hammer me into the ground by the end of the first day, but by gosh, he's nothing if he's not competent. Give the guy a case of toothpicks and a piece of innertube, and he could probably build a raft.

NCIS is one of the few television shows that The Husband and I will watch together. The Husband's non-ESPN tastes run to sit-coms, which I file under breaches of the Geneva Convention. Most sit-coms turn on pratfalls and abject humiliation, and I never got past the stage where I just empathized so strongly for the poor blighted character that I had to walk out of the room at the moment of their humiliation.

But NCIS, somehow or another, caught The Husband's attention. It has to do with several factors. One, it's not a particularly gory show after the first five minutes -- unlike some of my other fave TV show -- CRIMINAL MINDS or CSI. Two, it's got comedy in it, and if you want to keep The Husband's attention, you'd best keep his funny bone tickled.

As I write this, both The Husband and I are rather tickled at the prospect of the season premiere of NCIS. I've waited a long time to see what old Gibbs will do following last season's cliff-hanger -- and if his dad makes it after facing down a gun held by a revenge-bent woman.

I try to remember that I need to bring just that sort of balance to my own writing -- some choke-you-up tender moments, some shoot-em-up action sequences, some belly-laughs. What a good writer is doing is constructing a roller coaster that will take the reader on a ride. NCIS and other good shows like that help me remember that.

Or at least, that's what I tell myself about why it's worth 45 minutes a week for me to speed through the DVR'd version of NCIS. It could, of course, just be a fatal weakness for Mark Harmon.

Careers in Publishing, an Interview

Frequently I receive requests for interviews from writers, newsletters, and students working on papers for class, and I do make an effort to answer as many as I have time for. Luckily, many of the questions are the same from interview to interview, so I can reuse material. Recently, though, I did an interview and wondered why I wasn’t sharing this same information with my blog readers. So from time to time I’m going to post the interviews I’ve been doing here on the blog.

The first is a request I received from a student at Eastern Michigan University. The student was doing a class project on careers and was interested in literary agents and publishing, so here’s what I shared . . .


What's a typical day like for you? I don’t think there is a typical day for me, which is one of the things I love about my job. I don’t think I would do well in a job that was even the least bit predictable.

Each day takes shape depending on the emails and phone calls I need to make or receive. For example, if I get a call from a publisher offering a contract on a book, my entire day, and all my plans, will likely be placed on the back burner as I communicate with the author and editors about the book and begin contract negotiations.

If I receive a panicked email or phone call from a client I could spend the rest of the day working with that client to smooth out the wrinkles in her manuscript or work on revisions.

If I hear from an author who has an offer of representation or a contract offer from another agent or a publisher and I want to get in the game, I will likely have to drop everything to read that material and consider it for representation.

If things go smoothly and I am receiving few emails or phone calls, I could actually spend my day answering interviews like this, reading queries, or catching up on proposals.

Typically, though, I start the day by reading email, checking up on industry news through various different formats like Publishers Weekly, Publishers Marketplace, blogs and Twitter, and then base the rest of the day on what I find there.

What kind of writing do you do as part of your job? I honestly don’t think I do that much writing, but keep in mind I work with writers. It’s hard to say you write when you work with people who write thousands of words a day.

I do keep an almost daily blog, I send emails, I write revision letters to clients and, most important, I write pitch letters to editors to sell the books I represent. These pitch letters, or query letters, are really marketing pieces and can sometimes take hours to craft.

What kind of information do you typically look for on resumes and is there a specific format you prefer candidates to use? I look for experience first. I think one of the biggest mistakes candidates make is assuming their education is the most important thing they’ve done. If you’ve done internships of any kind I would put that at the top of the page; experience shows me that you’re different and more ambitious than anyone else I’m interviewing.

I also look for candidates with an interest in commercial fiction. I think that for many students there’s a prejudice against commercial fiction or genre fiction. You’ve been engrossed in reading literary books or classics for years, which are great, but as an agent who represents commercial fiction I need someone who loves romance and mystery, young adult and anything that’s new and different.

What is your favorite part of the job? Brainstorming with my clients. There’s nothing I love more than helping shape an idea and create a book.

How did you become interested in this field? The love of words. I studied journalism in college and worked on the college newspaper all four years. I really thought I wanted to be a reporter, but by the time I graduated I knew the newspaper business wasn’t for me, but I wasn’t sure where I belonged. I tried magazines briefly (for a few short months as a freelancer) after graduation, but didn’t like that either, and that’s when I realized that my true love was books. I didn’t really read newspapers or magazines, but I loved books and could never get enough. So it was really the idea of helping to create what I loved that got me into publishing.

Jessica

Does your main character need Prozac?

We writers can talk about motivation and backstory and character development until the cows come home. (Why, yes, I often do!) We can string together long paragraphs of introspection and volleys of dialogue in our efforts to "show, don't tell." (Oh, my, guilty as charged.)

One thing I can easily forget, though, is that a character's mood and outlook on life is probably one of the most important factors in making motivation make sense.

I was thinking about that as I read over two chapters that I've been working on in my current WIP. Both are from my heroine's point of view, and both take place by the same stretch of quiet river. In the first, when the river is a welcome refuge, my gal feels the cool river breeze. Later, though, as the scene goes on and when things go bad, that same river only feels hot and muggy and smells of dank fish.

My fingers hovered over the delete button as I read over those shifts. For a few minutes, I was convinced I needed to fix this. It showed a lapse in continuity, surely.

But I think I've talked myself out of it. After all, in real life, we don't always see things the same way, day in and day out, or even within the span of a day.

Think about how you view something as simple as a ringing telephone. If you're trying to avoid a call, your Great Aunt Zelda, say, whom you just know is going to draft you for bridesmaid duty, every ring creates knots in your stomach. You know how tacky your Great Aunt Zelda is, and her granddaughter, the bride-to-be? Well, her having been married three times already and still insisting on a church wedding and a white dress just says everything you need to know.

If, however, you're fully expecting Publisher's Clearinghouse peeps to call for directions to your house when they stop off with that big check, that r-r-riiiing is as beautiful as anything the New York Philharmonic could perform.

Of course, you can take this too far. If your character views anyone who shares even the most benign "good morning" as a Little Mary Sunshine, perhaps her next stop ought to be on a shrink's couch, with her hand out for a Prozac prescription.

The cool graphic that went with this blog post was purloined from JojoVanB's photobucket -- and trust me, it's better than Prozac to wash the blues away!

Query Auto-Response

Because of requests/comments from those on the blog, I have added an auto-response to all queries I receive. The response says the following:

Thank you so much for querying BookEnds. Your query has been received and I look forward to reading it.

Please note that I do reply to every query and make an attempt to do so within 4 weeks of receiving it.

If you haven't received my response in 6 weeks please assume that either your query or my reply was lost and feel free to re-query.

Thanks again.

Jessica Faust
BookEnds, LLC
http://www.bookends-inc.com

I’ve always been skeptical of doing something like this and I have no idea why. I guess part of me feared that it would only result in a ton of responses that say something like, “Thanks. I look forward to hearing from you.” Well, I’ve been pleasantly surprised. One author Tweeted to tell me how much she appreciated it, but other than that, nothing. No extra work for me, and hopefully this will help calm frazzled nerves.

So thank you, blog readers.

Jessica

Writing: easier than harvesting sand spurs?

I don't think writers truly understand the fear non-writers have for creating words. I have some idea -- if you want to turn me into a puddle of jelly, all you have to do is to demand the answer of 112 divided by 4, or the product of 36 and 9.

But just as math-geared minds think, "Pfft! Of course that's 28, and the product is 324," we writers go, "Pfft! A 200-word essay on the importance of being earnest? Easy-peasy."

(Of course, I'd actually groan, because whoever heard of being able to explain the importance of being earnest in just 200 measly words?)

I taught a lesson on writing to a group of third graders last week, and this fear was brought home to me all over again. Not only were these kids terrified to put something down, but they were also terrified that their ideas weren't good enough.

The Sister, a teacher of some 20 years experience, nodded sagely as I conveyed this. "I'd rather spend all day pulling sand spurs* out of a patch of grass than I would write a paragraph," she admitted.

What? This was news to me. My sister is a smart woman, extremely capable, one who graduated cum laude from college. When I pressed her for more details, she said, "Well, I'm just afraid that the commas will all be in the wrong place."

Commas?! Commas?! She's letting mechanics get in the way of a wonderfully creative mind? She's letting grammar grind her to a halt?

Okay, I have an additional confession to admit. I never minded grammar. I, in fact, loved diagramming sentences. I loved it so much that I never got called on to diagram sentences on the board because the teacher saw that I wasn't terrified by it, and therefore I deprived her of her buzz. (OK, that's not fair, but that's how I saw it in high school.)

But even so, not everything I write is perfectly grammatically correct on the first pass. That's what revision is for. A grammar check is the final polish.

Don't get me wrong. I believe in grammar. I will hunt you down over the loftily uttered, "between you and I" mistake (prepositional phrases take an objective, not nominative, pronoun), and subject-verb errors leave me itching.

But until you get the framework done, until you get the blank page filled, I'm not going to worry your little head about conventions or grammar or mechanics. Then, once I know what you're trying to say, I'll help you say it better and point you toward a grammar handbook.

Yeah. That's when you worry about commas.

*Sand spurs defined for Yankees: Sandspur or sandbur is a grass plant that produces a sticker that can really get under your skin, as so aptly defined by the University of Florida IFAS Extension Agency.

Weekend Adventures

5.7 mile (550 feet elevation gain) run in the rain. Check.
40 minute swim. Check.
Boot camp. Check.
16 mile bike ride in the rain. Check.
Packet pick-up for triathlon next Saturday. Check.

Bring it!

Room - Emma Donoghue

"Un-put-down-able" would be the best non-word that I can think of to describe this book. I can't quite say that I polished it off in a day as it was after midnight when I finally reached the back cover, but it was close.

In case you have missed the buzz surrounding this book, it is the story of a girl who was kidnapped at the age of 19 and locked in a room for 7 years; as told by her 5-year old son, Jack.

I heard Emma Donoghue interviewed a few weeks ago and she was influenced by the real-life story of the Austrian father who imprisoned his daughter in the basement for many years which hit the media a few years ago when the situation was discovered.

The book isn't perfect. I had trouble at first believing Jack's voice. For a child who is already able to read Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and write and parrot long passages heard on television, his grammar should be better than it is. My almost-4-year-old nephew speaks better English than Jack. And even if he knows the word "sarcasm", I can't see a 5-year-old being able to recognize it.

But even though this bothered me in the first few pages, I quickly forgot about these quibbles as I got drawn into the story. And I really was drawn into it - I found myself harshly jarred back to reality when the phone rang; and I had trouble falling asleep after finishing as the world of the book seemed more real than the real world.

It is a very well crafted story, with 5 separate sections: Presents (describing life in Room as experienced by Jack), Unlying (Jack discovering that there is a real world outside of room - his mother undoing the lies that she has been telling him), Dying (the escape from Room), After (the aftermath of the escape), Living (learning to live outside of Room).

This book is the only Canadian book to make the shortlist for the Man Booker Prize, and I wouldn't be surprised to see it on other book prize lists this year. Certainly all of the buzz that I have seen/heard/read about it is positive, and I have to agree with that buzz.

This is yet another book towards the Canadian Book Challenge over at The Book Mine Set.

Spider Bones - Kathy Reichs

While admittedly not first-class writing, I tend to rush out and gobble up each new Kathy Reichs book as soon as it comes out. When I read 206 Bones last year, I noted that the series had deteriorated from the early books but was looking up with 206 Bones. Spider Bones isn't the best in the series, but isn't the worst either.

It was a fast, easy read, and provided a change of scene from the usual setting of Montreal/North Carolina with a shift to Hawaii. And the mystery was a departure from the usual as well - there was a murder mixed up in it all waiting to be solved, but the primary story focused on trying to figure out how two bodies could have the same identity. That was a bit too easy for me - I figured out early in the book how the mistake had been made - but then there were lots of red herrings thrown in, and it was interesting to see how the characters proved it.

I have never seen the television series Bones which is (very) loosely based on this series of books, and for which Kathy Reichs is a producer, however there is a laugh-out-loud reference to the television programme in this book.

And if nothing else, this book has made me want to visit Hawaii some day!

And it counts towards the Canadian Book Challenge over at The Book Mine Set.

The Giller longlist is set to be announced on Monday - I'm looking forward to seeing which books make the list this year; and then the shortlist which will be announced on October 5.

Things Learned from Twitter

As many of you know by now I get up early and when I do I often check Twitter to see what's going on the world, especially the publishing world. For those of you who aren't up quite as early or haven't yet joined Twitter, let me share some of what I learned today...

I recently read a review of ROOM and really wanted to read it, but am nervous. It looks so dark that I'm not sure I want to put myself through it. That being said @JasonPinter has convinced me with this Tweet Ok, ok, you've all convinced me. I'm going to have to read ROOM by Emma Donoghue. Isn't that what you wanted???

Just what I've been looking for from @PublishersWkly: The Daily Beast has a list of 10 Smart YA Books, for those who've finished #HungerGames and are looking for more http://bit.ly/9DpvKU

I have added this to my wish list and now I have to decide whether I wait patiently for my wish to be granted or grant it myself. From @eatingfreely Got my copy of the "Gluten-Free Girl and The Chef" cookbook today! Gorgeous. Beautiful to read, beautiful to look... http://fb.me/IedBOr80

Depressing, but not surprising news from @Pimpmynovel (great blog by the way) Fun fact: each member of the cast of Jersey Shore currently makes more money per episode than most publishing assistants do in a year.

And with that I wish you all a glorious weekend. My plans? To read manuscripts by Kate Douglas, Grace Carroll, and Angie Fox. Uff, I better get moving.

--Jessica

Why you should never judge a book by its advanced buzz

I admit it. I am a contrary demon. Whatever everybody else likes, I turn up my nose in complete disdain. Later, I'll get hornswaggled into trying whatever it is, only to find that, for once, everybody else was right. It's happened over and over again: E.T., pine nuts, Hemingway, and ... Joshilyn Jackson.

When GODS IN ALABAMA first came out, it was one of those books people just gushed about, like THE KITE RUNNER or WATER FOR ELEPHANTS. "You've just gotta read this," they'd say. I'd make some excuse and go on my merry way. I'd feel guilty about this every time I was in a bookstore, and on one occasion in Barnes & Noble, I picked up the book, flipped it over, read the back cover, read the first page, and went, "Meh. It can't be THAT good." And back down on the big round table it went.

But then destiny found me. My library's supply of audio books had gone pitifully thin, and I was left with, you guessed it, GODS. I groaned and checked it out. But I was hooked by the time I got home -- hooked so much that I had a "driveway moment" where you stay in your car long after you've parked it, just so you can listen to what's blaring out of your speakers.

The book is about one Arlene Fleet, who has sworn to God to repent from her fornicating and lying and to never set so much as a pinkie toe back into Possett, Alabama -- as long as God will do one teeny-tiny thing for her: Keep the body hidden.

The body? Well, that's one of the gods in Alabama that Arlene talks about on the first page of novel. Arlene may have repented technically, but ONLY technically. She has a right-up-to-the-limit relationship with her boyfriend Burr, and she pulls all sorts of stunts to avoid lying -- like buying a laptop she doesn't need or want just to be able to tell her won't-take-no-for-an-answer Aunt Florence she doesn't have the funds to go back home. She'll return the laptop ASAP -- after she's told Aunt Florence. And the bit about not returning to Possett? Well, for all her traveling north to Chicago, it's clear that Arlene has never truly left Possett.

Arlene has a lot of demons to face, demons she wouldn't tackle at all if Burr wasn't insisting on being introduced to her family and the girlfriend of the boy she left under the heaps of Alabama kudzu wasn't hounding her. But before you know it, Arlene is waving hello to the Alabama state line.

The book is a tightly paced mystery, and Jackson is marvelous at creating a flawed hero that you root for. One of the reasons I was so long in reading it was that Arlene is supposed to be a murderess. How can I root for a murderess?

With Jackson's deft touch, I do. Jackson makes the south come alive -- warts and all -- and presents it in the unflinchingly love and honesty that only your best friend can match when she tells you, "You can't wear that dress. It makes you look as wide as the side of a barn." The thing I love best about her work -- beyond the clever mystery, beyond the wonderful characters, beyond how she keeps you guessing -- is Jackson's marvelous way with setting. Even in a Chicago Wal-Mart, Jackson paints a picture of the south and its customs and shows us what Arlene, a true southerner, has given up when she accepts her self-imposed exile. That's the moment that Jackson won me over -- that scene where Arlene breaks down into sobs and is comforted by a woman with a soft accent that reminds her of all she left behind.

I was the one who suggested this book for our BOOK HUNGRY on-line book club, and I'm eager to see what the rest of our members thought of it. You can, too! But first, if you haven't read GODS IN ALABAMA, I'm here to tell you ... you've just gotta read this!

Karla Nellenbach
Patty Blount
Abby Mumford
Elizabeth Ryann
Kelly Breakey
Alyson Peterson
Vanessa Noble

You Can't Make This Up

Okay, you’re all writers, so maybe you can make this up, but I don’t think there’s any way I can.

Within days of opening for queries I had roughly 350 queries sitting in my inbox, so Saturday morning I decided to sit down and read a few. I’ll admit, as per my previous posts, I didn’t get to many. Really only about 15 before it was time to get to work on other things, but with just 15 rejections (yes, I rejected them all) I managed to upset someone enough that I received an email tirade in response.

Kim thought the entire thing was hilarious (and she was right) and wanted to know if I was going to respond. Sometimes I do. With this one I didn’t. Sometimes I feel I might be able to explain myself further and hopefully prevent the author from making future mistakes by explaining the business better. Based on what this author said, however, I didn’t think any explanation would make a difference. Instead I’m going to tell you.

Now, before I get into specifics, I want to make it clear that of the 350 queriers this will likely be the only one who responds in anger. While we agents like to share the “horror” stories, the truth is that they are few and far between. It’s just not as much fun to tell you about the good stories. You know, the people who act professionally.

Before telling you about the specifics of the email, I want to let you know that in this case the email (the response) was well written. Clearly the author had put some thought into it, and while it did have a few typos (I assume made from rage), overall it seemed well done.

The anger this person had seemed to come primarily from the “impersonal” and “sterile” nature of my rejection. Well, I can’t argue with that. My rejections are, for the most part, impersonal and sterile. It’s a way for me to streamline the process and, typically, avoid emails like this. If it makes you feel any better, my requests for more material are equally sterile and impersonal.

What really confounded me is that the author felt that my use of the wording “not sufficiently enthusiastic” and “at this time” were disparaging to his book simply because it was “male-oriented.” I have no idea where that came from. I mean really? Am I not reading into those words the way some writers might? Frankly, if my email was so “sterile” and “impersonal,” how could you become insulted? And, to top it off, it’s truthful. Your query did not make me enthusiastic enough to request more at this time. Maybe if you resubmitted later? Who knows.

The author also took umbrage with the fact that I didn’t use any salutation in my email. This particular writer would have liked something along the lines of “dear sir,” which sounds awfully sterile and impersonal to me. It was also suggested that I consider “to the no-talent hack whom this concerns." That really doesn’t sound like me for a couple of reasons. The first is that it’s just mean, and the second that it’s untrue. Having read only your query, I really don’t know if you have talent or not and I certainly don’t think anyone who takes the time to write, edit, and revise a book and then put it out there for the world to judge is a “hack.”

And for any other agents reading this, please be aware that wishing authors “the best of luck” is now the biggest insult of all. According to this author it no longer has any meaning in publishing. I’ll admit, I suspect we all use this phrase or something similar, and I suppose that does dilute its meaning somewhat, but I also believe that we do sincerely wish authors luck. This is a tough business and we love books and authors. We would love to see all of you published.

Anyway, I was told to be more professional next time. The author was incensed that I responded too quickly as well. The author had submitted while I was closed and resubmitted (as per my first response) after September 6, so receiving “this kind of disparagement” only five days later apparently showed my arrogance and unprofessionalism.

There is one shining light in all of this. The author made it very clear that she would never submit anything again to me or anyone at BookEnds. Not a bad idea. I have a feeling we wouldn’t work well together.

Jessica

At the mercy of the food police

I am a self-admitted bad cook. Okay, not a terrible cook -- I can bring water to a boil without scorching it -- but I'm definately an uninspired cook.

That's the real reason I have 31 meals pre-planned that I use on a rotating basis. What? Me come up with something creative in the kitchen? Sorry, all that creative energy just got expended on my main characters!

We eat okay, but nothing to write home about -- or to write to school about. So imagine my panic when The Kiddo divested her bookbag of one (1) weekly food survey.

It was a chart, and The Kiddo was to fill it out with what she has for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The point, of course, is to teach healthy eating habits. But, oh, my, I'm about to get busted for enabling The Kiddo's Lucky Charms addiction.

Luckily The Husband in a stroke of complete serendipity prepared a grilled cheese sandwich for The Kiddo for breakfast yesterday morning, and supper was chili and cornbread, so I looked good, if I do say so myself.

This morning, though, The Husband said, "Now that they're checking meals, you need to cook healthier stuff." He proceeded to fry the child an egg.

It's not that I'm loading The Kiddo up on deep fried chicken tenders and french fries (I don't.) It's just that ... well, vegetables that I can afford bore the stew out of me. What is there in the frozen foods department besides baby limas, green beans, and turnip greens that are fit to eat? I've tried frozen carrots (yech), frozen broccoli (double yech) and the brussels sprouts are pretty much hit or miss.

Couple that with The Kiddo's strong propensity for noodles, and sometimes the only vegetable on the table will be the chopped up garlic that I used to season the pasta sauce (I know, I am a bad, bad mommy.) She likes salads (as long as they're caesar with no hint of carrots), but my grocery budget sometimes won't stretch to the arm-and-a-leg price tag on romaine lettuce.

I miss fresh summer squash and eggplants and sweet potatoes. Those are the interesting veggies. They also tend to be the expensive veggies that The Kiddo, most conveniently, won't touch a morsel of. Sigh.

Well, maybe the lack of those Happy Meals will make up for the lack of veggies? But if the food police come and arrest me, will someone bail me out?

Back to Accepting Queries

As most of you know by now, I was closed to queries for roughly six weeks in July and August. It was a wonderful six weeks. I got caught up on all queries and almost all proposals. When I reopened I had only four requested proposals left to read and one full I had just requested. I swear, I haven’t been this caught up for ten years.

Once I reopened, though, it was like opening the floodgates. By 9 a.m. on Tuesday morning (the day I opened) I already had 50 queries. By the time I returned from vacation on Thursday morning and opened email (at 5 a.m.) I had 260+. Now, granted, some of those might not officially be queries, so the first thing I did was skim through the box to see what could instantly be deleted. Here’s what I came up with . . .

A notification from a writer’s server that my email was low priority and I might not receive any notification that it was received. This was in response to an automatic reply I’ve set up to queries letting writer’s know that the email was received.

A notification from a server letting me know that I needed to ask to be on the recipient’s guest list. Please do that for me in the future.

A thank-you to my automated response. Please don’t thank me for letting you know the query was received. I know it’s hard not to, but this is one of the reasons agents don’t use automated responses. It just clogs our inbox further.

At least one pre-query asking if a query can be sent and how. FYI—I do respond to these with our submission guidelines.

Query letter sent as attachment. For the record, I don’t accept these, but will respond telling you I don’t accept these.

Okay, that’s what I found in two minutes of scanning. There’s obviously a lot more to scan. For the most part, though, it seems like the other 255 or so are legitimate queries and, in addition to getting to those, the requested proposals and manuscript, I also have at least four client proposals to read. Which means I better get busy.

Jessica

A new generation of plotters

After a 20-year hiatus, I found myself back in a classroom.

Two decades ago, I was a very young, very SHORT teacher trying to teach 150 kids art and spelling, whether they aspired to more than drawing a stick figure or could spell more than C-A-T. I thought I'd failed those kids (and in a way, I had), so I left the classroom. I was determined to dig ditches before I ever darkened the door of a classroom again.

But you can't NOT be a teacher if you're a parent, and I am first and foremost a parent to The Kiddo. Teachers are so swamped these days that often at least a quarter of the teaching of content subjects is left to the parents. I'm not saying teachers intend for that to happen. I'm not even saying that's a bad thing. But I can assure you that I've been mighty proud of all those education methods courses I toiled over in college. They've come in quite handy as I've shepherded The Kiddo through her elementary school career thus far. I honestly don't know how parents who don't have that background knowledge do it.

Between that homework-at-the-dining-room-table time and my previous successful (if I do say so myself) stint as a college English instructor for remedial students, I realized that I wasn't a half-bad teacher. I realized that I loved showing people how to do things. And the thing I especially love? The high that won't quit? The moment the lightbulb dings on for your student, whether she happens to be a 50-year-old returning college freshman or a 9 year-old Kiddo who finally understands the difference between conduction and convection.

In the midst of my job-hunting, I counted up my blessings, and one of them happens to be a defunct teaching certificate. In order to renew it, I'll need some time with the books (10 professional learning units or six semester hours of college courses), but it's doable.

But was it right for me? Would I be okay in a classroom? Would I even like dealing with whippersnappers all day long? Or would it be an utter failure like I thought I'd experienced two decades ago? The questions led me to volunteer in The Kiddo's school. No, I'm not in her class, but Tuesday was the first day that I served as a sort of reading coach to a third grade class.

And you know what? I had a ball! I learned a lot about classroom management from the teacher I was with, and I got to try out the skills I'd been honing on The Kiddo on a new crop of unsuspecting guinea pigs. They didn't seem any more the warped for it.

On Friday, I get to teach a writing lesson. Imagine! Me! Teaching third graders about writing! No, I'll spare them the lectures on deep POV and conflict (for now!). But I'm rubbing my hands together in glee at the prospect of turning the lot of them into -- gasp -- a whole class of plotters! Linda Grimes and Tawna Fenske will probably organize a protest!

The Gunny Sack - M. G. Vassanji

I first discovered M. G. Vassanji as an author earlier this year when I read and loved The Book of Secrets. So recently I went out to the local bookstore and picked up a couple of his other books, and have been reading The Gunny Sack over the past few weeks.

Unfortunately, I did not enjoy this book as much as The Book of Secrets. The plot was much more simple and straightforward, and at times I couldn't decide if he didn't have a point to make and so was just telling a story; or if he had an important point to make but didn't quite know how to make it.

It is basically a fictional memoir, if such a genre exists. The narrator, Salim, is of (mainly) Indian origin, born and raised in East Africa, who ends up in

North America - a strikingly similar history to that of the author. Like any traditional memoirist, he begins his story by telling of his ancestors (the first half of the book), and then continues with the story of his life.

There were some aspects that I liked - the complex family structure with the story spanning generations; the fluid writing style; and of course I always love being transported in a book back to my "other home" of Tanzania. And the cover. If you compare the cover of this book with this picture that a friend of mine recently took on Zanzibar (part of Tanzania), you know that the cover picture was taken on the East African coast.

But then there were aspects that I didn't like. As I mentioned above, the plot is very linear and lacking the complexity of The Book of Secrets; and I also found that the gunny sack of the title, as well as the sack's owner Ji Bai, played only a minor role in the book despite being built up in significance in the opening chapter.

I am going to be generous though. The Gunny Sack was M. G. Vassanji's first novel, published in 1989. The Book of Secrets came 2 novels later in 1994, and is definitely a stronger book while retaining the writing style. I also have a copy of The In-Between World of Vikram Lall which was published in 2003 so I am going to hope that he continued to develop as a writer, and that this book will be the best of all!

The Gunny Sack counts as a selection towards The Canadian Book Challenge over at The Book Mine Set.

A Day in the Life

I’m often asked what an agent’s day is like, and I thought of a million different ways to write this blog post up, but in the end I couldn’t do it, because no two days are the same. There are days that are so busy with phone calls that my ear starts to hurt, and there are others when the phone hardly rings but I’m spending all my time answering emails. There are days and weeks when I can’t even think about my query in-box and others when I have an hour here or there to read through a few.

While I like a certain amount of routine in my life, I love the unpredictability of this job. I like that each day isn’t exactly like the next.

That being said, I did track my doings on one day and here’s what happened . . .

I tend to wake up really early in the morning. My goal is usually to get to the gym, but that doesn’t always happen. Whether I get to the gym or not though, I always check my email first thing. So after flipping on the news and pouring a hot cup of coffee, I settle into the couch to see what my email looks like. After about 30 to 45 minutes I’ve weeded out the spam, deleted things like news alerts, and scanned emails from clients and editors. I’ll answer those that are easy to answer and leave the more complicated emails for later in the day. Any queries or submissions are automatically relegated to a query folder. I’ll look through those later.

From my email I hop over to HootSuite, the program I use to manage my social networking. Here I can see what publishing news I missed while I (gasp) slept. I can also check the status of my clients. I can find out who has finally finished the proposal to send my way, who is struggling with the next book and who is baking cookies I hope are sent my way. Some Tweets will be retweeted, some will require an email (to check in on the struggling client), and others can be ignored (most really). This Twitter check takes about 15 minutes, more if there are a number of news articles (publishing or otherwise) that I feel I want to read.

Morning is often the time, when it’s quiet, that I’m inspired to write a blog post. If I’m inspired I’ll spend 15 to 30 minutes writing one up. Only if I’m inspired, though.

Once my emails are sorted I enter the real world and do the things I need to do to get ready for the day. You know, things like brush my hair, feed the dog, wrestle kids and drink lots and lots of coffee. To give you perspective, this is usually around 6 a.m.

The family is organized, my hair is brushed, and I’m on my fourth cup of coffee. That usually means it’s time to get into the office. This could mean it’s 8 a.m., it could be 9 a.m., and it could be 10 a.m. It really depends. The “luxury” of being an agent is that my hours are flexible. Of course, that means the job is also round-the-clock.

Once I get to the office I start fresh. First I check emails, and inevitably I’ve received a number since early in the morning, and yes, many are from editors. I then move to focus on those I hadn’t yet answered to get them answered. This can take 15 minutes, it can take a couple of hours. It really depends on how many there were and how complicated the answers are.

I’ll sort through the piles left on my desk from the day before. These could include snail mail from organizations, trade magazines like Publishers Weekly, contracts, etc. Again, I answer those that are easy and will deal with the rest later.

On this particular day I spent two hours updating banking records and checking to see which payments needed to be followed up on. Typically this is something I do two to three times a week. Sometimes it takes an hour, sometimes three or four. Emails go out to editors at this point to find out why we haven’t yet been paid or when we can expect a check. How firm the email is depends on how long we’ve been waiting for the check. This can actually take some time since I have to remember which author is with which editor, who the emails need to go to, and what books I’m requesting payment for.

Royalty statements are a constant in our office, which of course we love. On this day I had two that I needed to review. That took about 30 minutes.

My intern had reviewed all the links on our website and blog and put together a list of those that no longer seemed active. I reviewed that list, approved changes and deletions, and sent that back to my intern. That took about 20 minutes.

Other aspects of my day included:

25 minutes: put finishing touches on a pitch letter for a client’s newest proposal
20 minutes: review submission list for said proposal and submit my pitch
30 minutes: respond to a smattering of equeries
30 minutes: grab a quick lunch of fresh mozzarella and tomato. Brown Butter Raspberry tart for dessert
15 minutes: respond to emails requesting the partial for previously submitted proposal. Submit proposal
45 minutes: phone call with client to discuss career concerns
15 minutes: respond to client emails
35 minutes: phone call with new client to discuss contract concerns
10 minutes: prepare contract for new client and send out
45 minutes: put finishing touches on publicity guidelines we’ve been working on for our clients. This has been a work in progress for the past month, so I’m pleased to see it completed
30 minutes: work on tax issues for a client

I’m sure there were many other things I did. More answering emails, quick phone calls, a chat with Kim or Katelynn about pretty much anything, a quick check to make sure the blog hasn’t gotten out of hand, another quick check on Twitter to make sure the world hasn’t imploded, etc.

Jessica

Leaky sinks and romance

Romance often begins by a splashing waterfall and ends over a leaky sink.

The ubiquitous Anonymous said that, and I have to agree. Yes, I'm a romance novelist, and yes, I believe in Happily Ever Afters, but this marriage business is hard work. Take it from me. Or no, take it from The Husband, who has suffered many, many indignities from me over the past 20 years. (Don't worry. He's repaid them all in full.)

The marriage started out all rainbows and puppies, as all marriages should. But pretty soon, I was letting him see my washed-out hosiery as it dripped-dried over the tub, and he was belching at the table without bothering to even say, "Not bad manners, just good vittles."

(Okay, so for the first year, he was probably belching from the indigestion he garnered from my poor cooking. I'm letting the belching slide.)

That is not to say that I don't love The Husband, and I surely hope he still loves me -- in spite of my bad cooking and my messy house and the fact that I tend to get welded to a laptop at an alarmingly frequent rate.

But romance ... ah, romance. We have traded it in (pretty much) for a good working-in-tandem partnership that makes sure all the big bases are covered.

And you know? I know what that's worth. It's priceless. Give me a man who will call me up and remind me to pick up the dry cleaning or totally understands my propensity to forget mailing off bills -- yes, give me that over a Romeo who will whisper sweet nothings and let the errands slide. I'm a pragmatic sort of gal.

I didn't realize that my preferences really slid to this even in literature. I want my relationships gritty. Real. Honest. I'm currently reading a perfectly lovely book (whose title will go unnamed because I don't want to slam the author). The problem? The love interest is just too perfect. Too romantic. Too understanding. In my head, I'm thinking, "OK, when's the other shoe going to drop?"

And of course with my comic-book-violence imagination, I'm thinking, "He'll turn out to be a cross-dressing ladies' man with three wives."

The hero hasn't revealed any size XXX negligees in his closet, and it doesn't look like he will. I think it's safe to say that this is a "perfect" gentleman.

Still, too much perfect romance in a novel, at least to me, is like too much cotton candy. Eventually? As my wonderful Aunt Lou used to say, "Well, now, after awhile, ya just get a bait of it."*

What do you think? What's the perfect balance of real man vs. Perfect Man in a romance novel?

Bait - south Georgia slang that means enough, a surfeit, up to your gullet.